Owie!

OMG you guys!

James found a piece of plastic pipe (about 1 in diam?) and was playing with it while I was putting stuff in the bread machine. He was in the living room for about a minute and then ran back into the kitchen. He was doing that gulping cry that proceeds a huge screaming crying fit while pointing to his mouth.

So I asked him "Did you bump your mouth?" He nodded and I said, "Well let me see"

Lips.... Fine
Teeth.... All there
Tounge... OK

By this time he was super upset and just wailing without making a sound and I just couldn't see ANYTHING that would make him act like that! So I checked again....

Lips.... Fine
Teeth.... All there
Tounge... OK... wait... there's a little blood...

So I had him tip his head back.... he had gouged a bloody flap in the roof of his mouth!! By this time he was screaming to beat the band! I let him have a few sips of water and then I squirted warm salt water over the wound (He did NOT care for that!! Let me tell you!! I managed to talk him into letting me do that again. Then I made him swish with cool water to get all the blood out of his mouth.

He's now laying on his couch, watching Scooby Doo to make him feel better.

He just turned to me and said "I just feel like there's a hole in my mouth"



Poor Buddy......

Today's Weather Report

Partly Moony


Courtesy of James's highly scientific method of looking out the window at 7am

Sunday Morning Sillies

Boy with hair in his eyes + Cheap Mommy who hasn't wanted to drag the kid to the one place 1/2 hour away that the child will sit nicely for a haircut and pay their outrageous prices + one stray red elastic spied under the loveseat = Ingenious solution (that we won't be mentioning to hubby, got it??)

Toss in some sunglasses for that "Oh so cool, extra toughness" factor!

Conflicted

I'm trying to decide if I want to go swimming today.

My fat says "No... You've been at death's door for the past week and you're nose is still 1/2 stuffed up and you haven't gotten your voice back! If you went swimming you would drown"

My house is saying "Clean me!! You've been neglecting me all week!!"

My health is saying "She's been ignoring me more than a week!! STFU house, she needs to work out!!"

My ass is saying "I'm fine where I am! Do you have any more of those Valentine M&M's? Is there anything new on YouTube??"


So I blogged. lol

Kite FAIL

That's not my job, Bub.

Yesterday morning, I set James down for breakfast and went back upstairs to finish what I was doing. When I came downstairs to Cheerios all over the kitchen, I handed him the brush and dustpan and told him (very calmly) to clean them up.

He was not particularly fond of the idea and I kept having to redirect him to his cleaning.... each time being treated to a new deluge of tears, during which at one point in time, he wailed "You aren't making my life any easier!!"

A new sound in town

You may have noticed (if you don't have your speakers muted, that is) that I've added a new song to my blog. This song plays over the end credits to the movie "Inkheart" and is sung by Eliza Bennett. It really resonated with me and I thought that I'd share it with all of you. I hope you like it as much as I do.

(If you scroll down to the bottom of the page, you can see the video... because I am apparently too "bloggistically stupid" to figure out how to embed the song here without linking the video also!)


My Declaration
~Eliza Hope Bennett

I'm gonna be someone, I'm gonna give something,
I'm taking it on, I'm taking it on,
It's gonna be my life, so I'm gonna live each day and each night,
Taking it on, I'm taking it on

'cause I can't keep hiding, no I can't keep hiding, and I can't keep running away
So I'm gonna be stronger, I'm gonna be better made, I'm gonna give everything,
Just to bring me back again.

I'm gonna be a braver soul than this,
I'm gonna jump at all those many chances that i've missed,
I'm gonna live my life beyond all these fears and forms of cowardice that keep leading me on.
I'm gonna shine out like a beacon in the night,
I'm gonna wrap my fingers around the stars tonight,
'cause i'm taking it on, 'cause i'm taking it on...

No I can't keep hiding, no I can't keep hiding, no I can't keep running away
So I'm gonna be stronger, and I'm gonna be better made, and I'm gonna give everything,
Just to bring me back again.
So I'm gonna be stronger, I'm gonna be understood, and I'm gonna give everything
Just to bring me back again!

'cause I can't keep hiding, no I can't keep hiding, and I can't keep running away.

So... I went swimming for the first time in almost 3 yrs...

Like.... REAL swimming.



Laps!!





HALF an hours worth!!





In a pool... without my kid!




AND treading water, in the deep end for over 5 mins!!






O.M.G. My. arms. hurt. so. bad. I'm having to prop my elbows on my knees to type! lol


Why did I do this?? What insanity possessed me to bestir myself from my favorite chair sitting/laptop surfing/diet coke swilling existence??


I blame the weather.

I've been promising myself that I would get back in the pool for exercise. I still have "baby weight" that needs to be shed... but it occurred to me recently, that once the "baby" turns 4 (and a HALF!!) that it can no longer be termed "baby weight" and has instead, morphed itself into Fat. Not just fat..... Fat. With a capital F. *sigh*

I have been less than motivated, however, to go to the pool in sub-freezing weather. For some reason, I have absolutely NO problem dragging my child to swimming class in the snow (actually I do... it means my Fat and I have to get up out of bed and go out in the SNOW!!), but quail at the thought of doing it myself! So today when it was 71(!!!) degrees outside, my Fat could no longer come up with any reasons for me not to tuck it into a swimsuit (eeps!!) and go to the pool. I must admit that catching a glimpse of my Fat in a simple one piece swim suit (with no Fat disgusing qualities like a skirt or super duper, steel-belted, mesh paneling) almost had me convinced that I needed to stay home. I knew I was going to cry if I heard one "mooooooo" from ANYONE at the pool.


Note to self: Do NOT go swimming 1.5 hours after drinking a Grande White Chocolate Mocha and eating a slab of marble pound cake. You WILL feel the need to vomit in the middle of the pool.

Out of all my years on the swim team, I never knew that you could sweat in the pool.... but I found it out today when I was in the middle of a lap, praying to make it to the wall without yarfing. I HAD to keep going, eventhough I was breaking out in a cold sweat all over my body and the wall kept getting farther and farther away with every stroke instead of closer. It is SUCH bad form to puke and drown in front of your child's swimming teacher in the deep end of the pool.

After swimming for 1/2 hour (about 24 laps and 5 mins of treading water), I drug my Fat back to the locker room for a shower and 15 glorious minutes in the sauna, where I was forced to hold a naked conversation with an elderly asian woman who was devoid of the Fat. *sigh* Then my Fat and I got dressed and went home.

And one would think this was the end of the story.... but it's not! lol

Deluded and quite possibly still dizzy from the sauna, my Fat and I decided to WALK to James's school to pick him up!! Walk!! I felt the need to know how long it takes to walk from our house to the CDC; so that when it begins to be warm ALL the time, we will use our feet to go to school instead of the car in an attempt to first reduce the Fat to fat and then to be rid of it completely.

For those of you who want to know, it takes 15 mins (or 2 Ricky Martins, one Aretha Franklin, and 1/2 an Adam Ant) to get from my front door to James's classroom sans child.


Not bad.


It takes quite a bit longer with said child in tow, as we are almost compelled to stop at the blue playground on the way home. But it's all good.


The bad news?? My arms hurt too much to cook dinner (note #2 to self... do NOT try to lift a full gallon of milk, for like, a week).... so we had pizza. My Fat was happy again.

*sigh*

This can not end well

James just made his own slingshot out of my elastic headband and his paper airplane.

Mood = Anxious

The list for Iraq is coming out in the next few weeks. Hubby has never been deployed there (if you will remember, he went to GITMO 2006-07 and has been home for almost 2 whole years), so it's damn near a lock that he's going.

I hate the not knowing.

Wow... just wow.

I was just trying to explain to James what was happening on the tv. This picture was on the TV.


















I pointed out then President-Elect Obama and told James that today was a very historical day (I know, I know... Drink!) because Mr. Obama, who is a black man, was going to be our new president.


James said to me "Yeah... it's important.... Which one is the black man??"




I tried to explain why it was an important point and he just looked at me. He really truly sees no difference between black/white/brown skin. "Oh... the man with a tan?" He sees us as all the same! How awesome is that??

Inauguration Day Drinking Game

Everytime someone on tv, in real life or on the internet says the words "historic", "change" or "Lincoln", you must take a drink!





You will be wasted before the actual swearing in! lol

Bedtime Smackdown!

Let's just say that the Nanny 911 "back to bed" bull crap does NOT work in this house. Ever since before Christmas, bedtime has gotten progressively worse and has practically disintegrated into a contest of wills. I don't' know if it's been due to the excitement of the holidays, the fact that James has been off his schedule, Daddy changing shifts, Mommy being sick or a combination of all those things.

Back to this week... but tonight especially. ~insert eye roll here~

James kept getting up, and getting up and getting up.... and MOCKING us about getting up. It would be one thing if he was still awake, quietly playing with a toy in bed or reading a book... but he was banging trains on his train table, jumping from the bed, "using the potty". Hubs and I were tag teaming it.... and James kept getting up, flipping light switches, running water in the sink, ect. I lost count of the # of trips I have made up and down the stairs.

So, finally fed up, I went up to James's room, sat him down on his bed, looked him straight in his eyes and told him that the next time he got up ALL his toys were going OUT of his room, and that Mommy was NOT kidding.

I barely made it down the stairs when I saw the landing/stair lights flashing on and off. So I grabbed my toy rake (the mini rake that I use to rake all the toys into a pile when cleaning), marched purposefully up to his room and said "You want the lights on, buddy? Ok... I'll turn your lights on... so you can see me remove all your toys!"

He thought it was funny, watching me push his train table out the door and rake and throw toys out onto the landing...

That is.....

Until I ripped the the plug to the Christmas tree lights out of the wall and chucked the whole tree, lights, garland, ornaments and all into the hall. It was a beautiful sight, watching that 4 ft tree arc out the door, let me tell you! I felt released of all the tension of a month's worth of sassy mouths and non-listening ears!

He stood up on his bed and started SCREAMING!! I tossed every train, car, Lego, mega block, Easter egg, EVERYTHING out the door (Hubs almost got hit several times, lol... but that was his fault for standing in the line of fire!)

James got to keep his teddy bear Remus, and I left all the books on the shelves.... but I cleared his floor, his bookcase headboard, the shelf and his closet of allllll the toys. I told him that if he laid down, and stayed in his bed that he could have his toys back in the morning.... but if he got up and didn't listen to Mommy that they would be going in the trash. (as if! We all know I'm too cheap for that!! Thank goodness *he* hasn't figured that out yet!)

All the toys are now sitting on my landing.... which is about 6x6 and has 4 doors and a stairway that opens up into it. James sat on his bed screaming the entire time I sat outside his door organizing the toys (so we could actually get into the rooms upstairs)

Then he kept yelling "I need a HUG!! I NEED a HUG!" I told him he could wait until I was done sorting the toys. I know this sounds harsh, but he was more upset that I wasn't dropping everything and rushing to his side, than he was wanting a hug.... if that makes sense.

And when I was done, I went in there and asked him why he thought I took his toys away. He got it right in one (smart kid). I told him that HE made the choice to have me remove all his toys by his behavior.... and it was HIS choice whether or not he would get them back in the morning. You could totally see the wheels turning in that brilliant little brain of his. And what do you know?? The tears magically dried up! I asked him what he needed to do to get his toys back, just to make sure he understood. He told me that he needed to lay down nicely until he went to sleep. EUREKA!! He got it!! He got his hugs and a kiss before Mommy went back downstairs.

15 minutes later.... all was silent.

Hubs thinks that I'm going to have a rough time getting James to bed this week while he's gone for training.






I have a feeling bedtime the rest of this week is going to be cake.

PSA for the Day

Do NOT mistake your window washing button for your cruise control when you are going 75 mph down the highway....

As heard from the living room:

In the meadow we can build a snowman
and pretend that he is raisin bran

We're happy tonight
We're happy tonight
walkin in the winter, run away

SLACKER!!!!

^^
That's me!! I admit it!! I'm a blogging slacker!! Get out your wet noodles and your sharpest edged tounges and give me the lashings I deserve!!

I WILL be updating tonight (or tomorrow...... )



WATCH



THIS



SPACE!!









(you can get up and go to the potty, but then you must immediately return!)

Even More Recent Conversation

Mommy... hugging you makes my arms happy!

Very Recent Conversation

Mom: What do you want to drink for dinner, buddy??
James: Milk
Mom: Ok... let me go get you some.
James: In a cup??

















No... I think I'll put it in a saucer on the floor. ~insert eye roll here~

I must be losing my mind.

I just realized my holiday baking list is insane!

I am making:
Dry cocoa mix
2 batches of cake balls - 1)Devil's Food Cake mix with buttercream icing and flaked coconut mixed in dipped in white chocolate and sprinkled with peppermint. 2)Spice cake with cream cheese frosting chopped raisins and nuts and in white chocolate
6-8 loaves of pumpkin bread
Peppermint Pinwheel cookies
Grandma Paul's Sand Tarts cookies
Lemon Snowflakes Cookies
Lacy Oatmeal Crisp Cookies
coconut bonbons
Easy Butterscotch Chip Chocolate Cookies
Sugar & Spice Cookies
Mocha-Kahlúa Thumbprints
and quite possibly 4-8 mini loaves of lemon poppyseed bread.

All before Dec 19th.

And I haven't even started yet. Hell... I don't even have all the INGREDIENTS yet!!

*sigh*



p.s. Add put together and wrap 29 presents for James's preschool friends to the list, please. Kaithanxbai!

Day 6: Family Advent Calendar Activity

Today had to be one of the most perfect days I have ever spent with my child. Honestly.



We started the day off by driving down to Kansas City to a free showing of "The Polar Express". Now... we have the dvd and watched it AD NAUSEUM last year. It never enthralled me. I usually surfed the net, read a book or did chores while it was playing. I could not have cared less if it was off or on.

And then we saw it in the theater.



It.



Was.



Awesome.



Seriously.



If you EVER get a chance to see it in a movie theater DO IT. The fact that it was free made it even better! (well... "free" discounting the purchase of the vat of Diet Coke and potato sack of popcorn, lol) And if you do... try to grab a 4 yr old to see it with you. If you don't have one at home, borrow one from a friend or family member. Trust me. A 4 yr old MAKES the viewing experience! Even the Grinchiest Grinch, Crankiest Scrooge, or Grumpiest Grumplegus would find their heart expanding 8 sizes and the joy and magic of the season being infused into every cell in their body. I spent 1/2 the time watching the screen and the other 1/2 watching James. I purposely haven't put the dvd in this year, so the movie would be fresh for him. His eyes were as big as saucers! He gasped, shrieked, covered his eyes, and made several exclamations through out the movie that had those around us chortling into their popcorn. I found myself experiencing the movie through my child's eyes... all the laughs, thrills and spills... I even teared up a few times!! James, of course, was oblivious to everything except the movie and consuming his weight in popcorn! lol I cannot recall the last time I experienced that pure level of joy at a movie.

From there we walked the shopping center, enjoying the dancing fountain, beautiful Christmas tree and decorations in spite of the blustery wind (and Mommy forgot to grab hats and mittens in the rush out the door this morning, oops!! In my defense, we didn't plan on shopping after the movie). We wandered around, visiting all the shops and sales. James was as well behaved as a child being dragged in and out of stores to look at clothes could be expected to be.

He even made a purchase on his own! In T. J. Maxx, He found a toy that he reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeealy wanted.... and while I usually wouldn't get him a toy this close to Christmas, I decided that since he had been such a good boy, he could buy it with his own money if he wanted (his wonderful Godmother had sent him some money for his birthday). So we sat down with the toy and his money and I helped him figure out how much the toy would cost and how much money he would have left over. We went through check out and he handled the transaction all by himself, handing the toy and money to the clerk at the appropriate times and gathering his bag, receipt and change. We counted his change that he got back and put it in his pocket. He left the store with the bag clutched in his hand and the biggest grin on his little face.

From there, we sauntered to Books-a-Million.... stopping at EVERY map on the way to double check our route and find the "You are here" sticker! lol Once there, we snagged a book for Mommy and then made a beeline for the train table. During the hour we were there, there were some minor disputes over the engines and tenders with other kids, but nothing that couldn't be solved with a gentle reminder on manners.

The trip home was uneventful. We listened to the PE soundtrack and sang along. I was glad we got home before Big G had to go to work. James had fun showing Daddy his toy and recounting our day for him.

I thought about taking James to see the Christmas Parade and tree lighting in town.... but we had such a perfect day that I didn't want to push my luck by taking him to stand still on a sidewalk out in the cold!! lol

It was a good choice.